SlutWalks Are Great For Snagging Fat White Sluts

Have you ever heard of Slutwalks? You gotta try it out man, especially if you like being around fat white sluts like I do. These dimes won’t admit it, but the truth is that Slutwalks are really just Fat-Acceptance opportunities spectacles disguised as feminist activism. But hey, you know I’m super down with that. They’ll try to say specifically that they’re protesting against this whole notion that provocative dress invites RAPISTS. When they talk, I just nod my head, “okay whatever baby, that makes sense.” Seriously, It isn’t like walking around in the hood with stacks of money hangin’ out your pocket invites muggers, cause that’s way different. 

Believe it or not I’ve attended a few of these Slutwalk marches because I love fat sluts sympathize with the core principle of their movement: Overweight white women shouldn’t feel ashamed of looking and acting like fat sluts, they should flaunt it! They should feel encouraged and empowered to let their beefy muffin-tops and cottage cheese asses sag freely and openly. That’s why they got my fucking support. Amen.

Not too long ago I was in Toronto for a SlutWalk march, and boy was I surprised at the sheer size, density, and thickness of all the fat Slutwalker buffalo-bitches stampeding through the city. I couldn’t wait to join the crowd.

slutwalknigel

I’m looking smooth like Morpheus from the Matrix. 

Luckily I brought my sunglasses with me, because I recognized many of the BBWs from Craigslist personal ads I had responded to in the past. Many of them were past bangs, and I didn’t want them to recognize me; damn It really is a small world after all. Anyway, as the march went on, the women started chanting and yelling louder and louder. All of the sudden the crowd of thick, sweaty bodies started to clump together all around me, squeezing me in. With all that these thick walls of soft flesh around, my boner got more and more stiff, which subsequently became harder to conceal. One BBW felt the tip of my junk on her trunk and turned around to see what it was, but I played it cool, pretending my hand was in my pocket.

It didn’t help that I kept bumping into her ass with my stiff cock: the jig was up. She gave me a funny look. I tried apologizing to her, “Baby, excuse me” but she snarled at me and turned away, releasing a rancid angry-fart out of spite. My boner got even harder. That’s when I knew I had to improvise a way to prevent another accidental bump with my junk, or else the whole crowd of Slutwalkers would turn on me. So I took the sign I had and held it over my crotch as a barrier. Then I unzipped my pants and let my cock hang loose while I stroked it like a ninja, or just some Secret Negro Agent 007 shit. Ultimately masturbating helped reduce my boner so I could act more normal. Despite having so many fat white bitches up close, squishing me in, I was busting all kinds of nuts with maximum stealth. Dozens in truth. It was a long march.

Lookin' like Morpheus from the Matrix.

She’s not even looking at me, but I’m looking at her.

As the march was coming to a close, I left early and headed for my food truck, then drove it up to the horde of hungry Slutwalkers. A long line of fine looking sluts formed at the side of my truck, with their eyes were lit. All the sudden I went from being a random black dude in a white-feminist-march to feeling like a hiphop star with white groupies. I was killing two birds with one stone. As I say, “Make some dough, bang some dough.” That’s my motto. I even had a special offer for big sluts that signed up for my free dessert membership plan — which was actually just a cleverly disguised sexual-consent form. Shout out to my lawyer!

In conclusion, when it comes to RAPE, BBWs secretly love rapists and stalkers. On top of that, since when does any woman consent with a “yes” for a pussy pounding? She can’t even say “yes” or “no”, just “mmmm mmmm” when she’s got that whole 9 inches of Nigel’s snicker bar rammed down her turkey-necked throat.

“baby my bad, you gonna need some honey lemon tea for that sore throat.”

Follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

10 Reasons Why YOU Should Fuck Fat Women

fathungrywhore

You could sneak up right behind her #BBWdistracted

#1. Big Women Deserve Big Love.

Because of size-discrimination and racist/sizist manosphere bloggers like Heartiste, BBWs have a very hard time finding real men that have the proper credentials to handle their larger equipment in the bedroom. BBWs are an acquired taste. They need men with patience and experience in the unique art of super-sized-seduction. So If you have a big cock (black guys) and have the desire to hit it, it’s your duty. Save the whales motherfucker!

#2. They Are More Desperate for Sex: Get Your Notch Count Up Brothers.

So you walk into a bar and call it a night because you can’t find a girl under 170 pounds? You’re a bitch. You’ve failed at being a man. If anything, you have the advantage because BBWs are insecure about their body image. Make them feel good by doing the right thing. Fuck them up: they need they’re pussies wrecked. You get bonus points from her for finding her pussy. It’s never been easier to get your notch count in the 3 digits.

#3. You Live in the United States.

If this country gets any fatter it’s going to sink into the ocean, so it’s time to learn to swim. In other words, that means goin’ with the flow and fucking fat women. If this continent actually does sink, your BBW fling can double as a flotation device — provided she doesn’t somehow weigh more than the water she displaces.

#4. BBWs Are More Submissive.

See reasons #1 and #2: the dating market is an economic market, and fat women are in great supply. They need you more than you need them.

fat slave

Food Torture

I love making fat white bitches my sex slaves, it’s the ultimate revenge for slavery. Send them to my pigpen. Amen.

Picking up BBWs is liking getting Burger King: have it your way.

#5. They Give Better Head.

Because they’re hungry. She probably uses a corndog as a dildo, imagine what she’ll do to your dick after you put some mustard on it. Ask her if she likes Hershey kisses and you got easy rimjobs.

#6. Bigger Ass and Titties.

You like a big ass? You like big titties? I can hear you say hell yeah! Amen.

She’s got thick slabs of flesh that need a good flossing. Gotta clean ’em out.

#7. They All Love Video Games.

fatbitchgames

Come on bitch, put down that controller. We’re going to play a Big Game now. It’s Massive-Multiplayer: you, me, and that fat white ass.

Now what man on earth doesn’t want a girl that likes to play video games? Come on man, you know regular dates are bullshit. You’d rather just play video games and fuck than take her to the movies to see some hollywood remake. Wouldn’t we all? Well guess what, that’s exactly what she wants too! That and lots of food. But hey, you like 7-11 nachos too, right? Sounds like a win-win-win (triple win) situation right there. Play video games, eat, and fuck!

Now quit being a bitch when you can have it your way. Time to hit up the big pussy. A new notch is better than a new Xbox live achievement. Trust me on this.

And again, big bitches love video games. They gotta do something after fucking and eating, shit.

#8. Using Food Instead Of Money = Legal Prostitution.

BBW-Food-Pyramid

                                                  Here’s a Guide

Why pay for sex when you can make a nice meal? It’s cheaper and less humiliating than handing her dollar bills. She’s hungry, and if you can feed her, she’s going to spread ’em. Sometimes you have to force the food in her mouth, but as long as it gets in there you’ve won half the battle to the pussy.

#9. You Get Discounts on Electric Wheelchairs and Motorized Scooters.

Anywhere you go where they sell wheelchairs and motorized scooters, you get a discount. I buy them all the time, though I don’t need them for myself. Rather, I buy them for my game, it’s just part of my logistical tool set. I have a collection of wheelchairs I bought cheap. As I always say, “always have a spare wheelchair, just in case the first one breaks.”

Also you get free handicapped parking too. As long as you are escorting (or corralling) hoards of fat mammoth hoes, you don’t need a legitimate handicapped sign in your windshield. Fuck the system.

#10. It Will Improve Your Cooking.

In Big Game, you gotta feed your bitches. And you have to get better at it each time if you want to progress and get easier big bangs.

Recently I made cannolis for a special BBW… With cum filling.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

Read More: The logistics of banging fatter women.

How I pick the right woman

nigel kills it again

She was born hungry, and I fed her well.

Back in my early days when I was a younger man, I was a french fryer at McDonald’s. I thought the smell I brought with me from work to the club was all i needed to be a big-ass-getter. But I was so on it, so hungry, so inexperienced, I didn’t even give bitches the chance to smell me. I just chased girls with big asses like I escaped from prison and had to bust a nut real quick before the police could catch me and send me back. I was always buying new clothes, trying to increase my swag, and hustling hard like a door to door salesman selling dick. Sometimes it worked, but man, It got tiring; it was hard work. I usually only drink Gatorade after fucking fat BBWs to replenish my electrolytes and energy/sugar-levels, but back then I had to drink that shit all the time because I was exhausting myself so much. At one point I had to smoke crack just to keep up and stay alert. Then my hair was starting to turn grey, and I had had enough. Those were the days… Then a major paradigm shift changed my game forever. One day I saw a man on TV hunting wild beasts in Africa. He took his time to wait and ambush big game beasts, and that’s when I knew that catching big game required big game. It was so much more strategic, relaxing, and intelligent than what I was doing all along. All the pieces of the big game puzzle finally came together. This ain’t checkers motherfuckers, it’s chess.

So let’s come back to the present, around last week. It was big ladies night at the Ham Hock Saloon. I weaseled my way into the VIP party room where they had an open buffet and strategically planted myself in front of it — specifically the table with the fried chicken assortment. The BBWs started waddling their way in like a stampede. I was gettin’ real excited but kept my cool with a big pitcher of beer in my hands. I stood there posted up like a soldier on guard duty, just watching them get comfortable, waiting for all that food to start digesting and sap up their strength. The time started to fly and the room got hot and sweaty, when all of the sudden I felt an intense pressure on my foot, like a truck had run over it. I thought my foot was about to be pulverized, but I held my breath to avoid screaming in public. I looked down and noticed it wasn’t someone’s foot stepping on my shoe, but instead the end of a walking cane — a fat ass woman (with severely debilitating gout) had inadvertently placed the end of her cane on my foot for support as she struggled in a lumbering waddle, on her way to the next buffet. Immediately all the anger and pain turned into excitement, because the weakest link in this procession of very big titties-n-ass had just stumbled into my clutching range.

She was short and very wide, especially her ass — no wonder she needed a walking cane, it was epic; or maybe it was because of her gout, which looked like a giant ass tumor. I had to make the first move, so I grabbed her by the love handles and pulled her closer, pretending to whisper something in her ear about how I noticed her checking me out, and how beautiful I think she is; see a little flattery goes a long way with big bitches, and it’s a great way to buy time. She smiled, and then I offered her some beer from the pitcher I was holding. She gave me a funny look and then asked me if I was just trying to get her drunk, but I was like, “baby, you serious? Just have a sip.” She looked thirsty, and I was thirsty for her epic ass and pussy, it was a win win situation. But being a black belt in big game, I also knew something else: if I could get her to drink the whole pitcher of beer, it would seriously agitate her gout. So I put the pitcher up to her lips and I started chanting, “drink! drink! finish it bitch!” and got the whole room to chant with me; the peer pressure set in and the beer disappeared. It didn’t take long for her  to guzzle it down, she was born to swallow.

After drinking all that beer, it only took 2 minutes for the pain to set in. Her big ass foot with the gout was glowing red hot and lookin’ ready to explode. She could barely stand up, even with her cane for support. She started leaning on me and moaning. I knew I had her right where I wanted. “Excuse me folks, coming through. She needs help taking a shit” was all I had to say, and everyone moved out of our way as I guided her to the restroom. One hater that supposedly was her friend jumped out in front of me and asked me what I was doing, but I pulled out my wallet and quickly flashed him my health insurance card that has a blue cross on it, “I’m a nurse at the hospital, I work with obese patients. I’m a professional, I know how to handle this.” He quickly shut up and walked away. Once we made it to the restroom, I guided her toward the stall. She put up some physical resistance; and being a big woman, I knew it wasn’t going to be easy to just push her in, so instead I yanked her walking cane away and she fell to the floor like a limp sack of shit. She fell into the stall perfectly, just barely fitting in with her ass hanging out. I couldn’t close the door, but it’s didn’t matter. I unzipped my pants and got to work, kneading her doughy ass with my chocolate dough roller.

It is thanks to my strategic approach to big game that I don’t have to break a sweat and waste my time if I don’t want to. Sun Tzu would approve.

my man sun tzu

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

A good woman’s heart is bigger than her ass.

Listen to this beautiful woman sing: so innocent, so pure, so feminine. She might be too big for Heaven, but she’s still an angel! Sing it with me baby “yum yum, Sunny D and Cum!”

One thing I talk about a lot with BBWs is how belligerent and mean they can be sometimes; when a fat woman is a bitch, she’s a BIG BITCH, and ain’t nothing gettin’ in her fucking way. Something about all that fat on her ass goes straight to her head and turns her heart into an extra salty sourdough pretzel; which leads to a shit storm of cognitive dissonance: “If that man doesn’t think I’m beautiful then it’s because he’s a gay ass nigga, fuck him!!!” And, god help us, she thinks that gives her carte blanche to throw all her weight around and shake her flab-slabs until the earth quakes and the Burger King’s kingdom crumbles. That’s most fat bitches for you. Big game ain’t easy. But then sometimes, if you’re lucky, you’ll come across those rare gems: a real BBW filled with innocence and joy, just waiting to open up. A good BBW’s heart is bigger than her ass, believe it or not (cause that’s a lot of heart) and they can be found if you know where and how to look.

Usually I run my big game plays at Walmart until I get sick of the same fat white hoes breezing through the aisles like they deserve all the sodas and Oreos they’re stocking up on. That’s when I hit up the lower income spots and find myself big girls that are truly in need of big love. I look for a big girl that I see taken her folks out to a nice cheap western buffet, like Golden Carrol (specifically when they got those two for one specials). I’m talking about big bitches that have it hard. They have to be loving and caring to everyone because they can’t afford to act like a bitch, literally. Some of these BBWs are big because they’re poor: they have to stuff themselves with whatever they can get their hands on. For these bitches, McDonald’s is a real treat! So you better believe they’ll gobble up some dick too. In fact that brings me to my pickup line: “hey girl, want a snack?” Also take note: If you’re a seasoned big game stalker, you’ll be tempted to hit up your usual spots again, but part of the challenge of chubby chasing is knowing when to just kick back and take the easy pussy.

See, that's what I'm talking about. A BBW in need.

See, that’s what I’m talking about: A BBW in need. You gotta help her out.

Fat girls that are nice appreciate any kind gesture and will reciprocate with love, so I don’t mind taking a big bitch or two over to Red Lobster as a treat. That’s right, for nice BBWs I take it slow and reward them with a nice romantic dinner. When’s the last time you took a big bitch out? You should try it! Because this also doubles as a test, a test to see if she has a big heart too. You see Red Lobster really isn’t so special if you’ve been to AppleBees or Ruby Tuesdays or even Nigel’s cajun shack down the street, but to a big girl that hasn’t been that spoiled it’s amazing. She’ll think you’re taking her to the Taj Mahal. That’s how you weed out the jaded BBWs that are entitled bitches. If she complains about anything, I know I got myself a wild BBW bitch and just shift my game accordingly. But I really don’t want the wild, entitled bitchy one, I’ve had enough of those for now. A nice girl will be impressed instantly, warming my heart when she says the shrimp basket looks cute. See that’s how you know you’ve got a good girl.

And for dessert, we head back to my place and I take the time to make her a Mississippi Mud Pie with ice cream, because she is special. I light some candles and spoon feed with my shovel, building some more comfort. And as you know I like to turn seduction into a fun game, so I’ll start by throwing food at her mouth like a good ‘ol sexy game of cornhole; then pulling out my dick to feed her a chocolate fiesta! Conclusion: treat a nice lady like a she’s a nice lady first, otherwise you’re the mouse frightening the elephant. But elephants can’t smell a sneaky shit house rat 😉

 

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

Silence of the Hams

Recently a very clever brother I know, we’ll call him JW, came up with a very interesting tactic that I decided to borrow (thanks brother). I’m sure he won’t mind since he’s left the game to live an ascetic existence in the Caribbean. Anyway, I’ve already successfully incorporated this method into my own chubby chasing arsenal. Let me break it down for you.

The idea behind this: Instead of going to Walmart all the time, why not get these mammoth-walrus sluts to waddle there way to my place? Ahah, light bulbs lit up and then exploded in my head like fireworks when I figured out how to do this shit. It’s simple: just pretend you are some kind of talent scout for a beauty pageant or modeling agency. I started putting out flyers and ads on craigslist for a BBW beauty pageant promoting fat acceptance. Here’s the flyer I used:

The results were off the chain. It was like something out of Hansel and Gretel, and I was the witch with the gingerbread house; but instead it’s made of pizza and cornbread too. In fact, the auditions were held at my house, and I laid out trails of cornbread covered with nutella from the front door to my bedroom. When each BBW entered through the front door for the audition, she knew this is the place to show off her fat acceptance, where she can comfortably embrace her lack of willpower.

When a fattie approaches, I leave my door unlocked and open it just a crack, so it swings open when she knocks. As she enters, the BBW sees the trail of food and hears the voice “Come on in baby. Treat-yo self.” It’s my voice coming from the bedroom, as I lie in wait for the impending ambush. She starts eating the food that leads to my bedroom, as I put on my ski mask and turn up some R&B music. As she follows the trail of food into the hallway, getting closer, the tension thickens.

The sound of her chewing gets louder and louder as she gets closer, and my dick gets harder and harder as I hear her grunting like a hog while she eats. My body starts sweating, as I become more impetuous. Finally (this is where my experience in Mixed Martial Arts comes in handy) I leap out of the bedroom and judo throw her extra-large ass to the ground, then hogtie her up. Now the pipe laying commences. My joint is harder than wood in wintertime when I plunge it into that pussy, balls deep. It goes in so hard sparks fly out because of all the friction. She squeals in pain with the nutella and cornbread still stuck in her mouth, while I’m throwing up her flabs like a pizza chef tosses dough in the air. Finally smoke starts coming out that pussy — time to switch holes! After I break off a nut or two in that ass, I turn up some James Brown and bust a move, woooo. That’s how I celebrate a fine day. After beaten that fat pussy up, time to put some ice cream on that ass to cool it down; open a few windows to let the tension out, and hear the birds sing.

If she is still around, I let her have some cookie dough as a treat. BBWs get hungry after sex. Plus It definitely ain’t rape if she licks cookie dough off my balls.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

Haters Gonna Hate

One thing you’ll notice about my blog is that some of my more controversial posts get nasty comments from bitter, angry fatties unworthy of the BBW title. If there is one thing that distinguishes a fat hoe from a BBW, it’s her capacity to be comfortable in her own skin and big flabby-flabs — not unleashing a shit storm of pent up big fat player hate against me, the one man that’s showing the way to Fat Acceptance. I pray for each hater when she leaves hate on my blog, because God knows all haters go to hell.

fat woman that a hater

What my haters look like after they read one of my posts. “Hey bitch, there’s a twinkie behind you.”

My haters seem to gravitate toward my Sex Slave post and my About Me section. So let’s analyze some of these evil, hateful comments. It’s time for me to address them here and now:

Really? I cook all kinds of pizza and fried chicken and make ice cream, for all my bitches! I don’t hate them for their larger size, I love them for it! You call that misogyny??! Bitch, what are you smoking? Crack? No wonder you can’t find Mr. Right. Good luck anyway.

Next we got this mysterious fattie playing the hater role (again). She probably has a low self esteem and we all know what that means…

I’m just telling the truth. And you don’t even deserve a cream pie with that  horrible fattitude. You sound hungry though, and hunger is the leading cause of all fattitudes. Nigel’s fat camp is enrolling. We take in women that have self-esteem issues for sure 😉

Next up we got us a real big, thick, extra-fat Jabba the Slut that is really a secret admirer. She wants to subscribe to Nigel’s feeding and breeding program, but there’s some kind of cognitive dissonance that prevents her from admitting it. She is in the closet, waiting for some chocolate:

Come on… You know you want it. But since you can’t openly admit it, you spit hate on my Big Game Blog. I highlighted what you said about liking sex slavery, Freudian slip? The gates to Nigel’s pig pen are open, come on in and we’ll wrestle in the mud.

This fat little piggy has hate rolling off her sweaty flabs. I think all that hate violates the laws of Feng Shui or Chi or whatever. Confucius say “when fat bitch angry, she should turn the other chin”, but unfortunately she doesn’t listen to Confucius.

“Fat women lie about rape all the time” BINGO! Sometimes haters accidentally spill out some truth. God, if someone put me to the test, I wouldn’t be arrested, I’d get a trophy. A trophy for first place in fat acceptance and big game. What would you get a trophy for Rachel? Besides being a fat ass bitch? Champion summer sausage swallower?

And here’s a hater that’s full of shit:

Un huh… Really? You feel this way too?

But she is actually a hypocrite. In my Fat Rating System post she wants to know how she measures up, when she left this comment:

Hypocrite….You’re a groupie in denial.

That concludes this post. There are other haters for sure, and some manginas are haters that are angry because they get no vagina. Not all is lost with the female haters though, because each one is just one good dick away from healing. I know this for sure, because I have a degree in holistic healing, and let me tell you: sex is therapeutic. It is the way to healing for all angry fat feminist hate mongers. Fat Acceptance is about healing as much as it is about gettin’ bigger ass.

The 10 Commandments of Big Game Hustling.

The 10 Commandments of Chubby Chasing.

Sometimes posts get long and the critical information you need — the tips and tactics — get lost in my flamboyant, eloquent fancy writing style. So as a man of God It’s my duty to simplify your spiritual journey to Big Fat Ass ‘n’ Pussy, as well as helping you define your moral compass at the same time. I’m going to whip it out like Moses with his staff, and lay it out for you to see all in a single post. This is not going to be your typical blog roundup post. I’m doing this 10 commandments style, bringing you holy Big Game wisdom to help you with your Big Game Hustle. Amen.

1. Feed your Big Beautiful Women. These women are hungry and they need your help. In the Bible God tells us to feed the hungry, so this is really killing two birds with one stone. You win points with God and you get her excited to come back your place for more food at the same time. Follow this advice and you’ll get two thumbs up from God when you hit that mammoth pussy. After a night of banging out earth-quaking-ass, don’t forget to make her breakfast in bed the morning after.

2. Be Blessed where the Sun don’t Shine. If you manage to get a BBW back to your place with the pretense of getting some food, she’ll be expecting to devour a serious sized summer sausage too. There is a very good reason for this: the physics of penetration. You won’t make a dent in those thick rolling slabs and thunder thighs with a small Asian dick. If you want to be a Big Game Hunter, you gotta use a high caliber bullet. This is where black guys come in 😉

3. Help Guide Fat Women to become BBWs. The journey from fat slut to Big Beautiful Woman is a spiritual one. As an ambassador of fat ass gettin’, it is your job to guide each fattie to BBW-hood, by making lewd comments and suggesting things that accentuate her chubbiness. Tell her it makes your dick hard. Tell her to let the flabs hang out. Tell her that her muffin tops look tasty like real muffins. Tell her you want to jizz in her insulin pump. Play video games with her after you fuck her. It’s a wonderful sedentary activity that will later force her to believe in body-acceptance because video games make you fatter.

4. Fulfill her rape fantasy. Fat women feel an intense urge to be wanted, even though most men are afraid to harpoon big punani. They develop imaginary stalkers and rapists to fill the void; that way they have something to talk about when their thinner friends talk about sex.

5. Become a Better Man by Increasing your Notch Count. God created all men equal. But if there is one thing that separates the men from the boys, it’s a high notch count. In America, with the rising rate of obesity, the only solution is to become a chubby chaser.

6. Protect your BBWs from the outside world. Many extremely large women are discriminated against, persecuted and made to feel ashamed of their size. The largest ones are gawked at like they’re side show freaks. This is why it’s important to insulate your big-bitches from the outside world. As soon as you snatch one up, lock her up in your fat love fortress so the outside world doesn’t harm her anymore.

7. Embrace and share the gospel of Fat Acceptance. As men doing God’s work, It is absolutely imperative to show our love for Big Beautiful Women. One way is to stand up and shout it out loud, but the best way is to practice what you preach by bending that big behemoth slut over and letting her feel it too.

8. Be Safe. Wear your hard hat.

9. Become a Walmart Shopper. Walmart is the most successful retailer in America, because it was God’s will. And God wants us to shop there for our groceries 😉

10. Her Stomach is the key to her Heart. Learn how to cook, and how to cook well if you want to break through her big fat resistance to sex. Nothing eliminates last minute resistance like a fatigue inducing insulin rush. Whooooo, who the fuck needs Chloroform when you can use fried-chicken-alfredo-pizza and Faygo soda?