Fat Acceptance Is About Overcoming Obstacles

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I’ve been in my rockin’ chair lately, at night, just sittin’ on my porch and thinking a whole lot about big game. I’ve got the bayou right in front too. Staring at it calms me down after a hard day of big game and making big bitches sweat. I love it, It’s like a moat that prevents my bitches from escaping, and them crocodiles floating around need to eat too. But anyway, what was I saying? Oh right, I reexamined my own philosophy on chubby chasing and it got me thinking about how fat acceptance fits in. We all know that fat acceptance is about self acceptance. It’s about a big honey lovin’ herself for the person she is on the inside, as well as her big beautiful rotund form, no matter what baby! And that’s just the way God wanted it. But what everyone forgets is that fat acceptance ain’t just for bitches no more, it’s for chubby chasers too. Like climbing mount Everest or running alongside the bulls in Spain, big game is a manly challenge waiting for y’all to Accept; It’s an adrenaline roller coaster that will test your endurance, patience, compassion and mental strength. That’s why we call it Fat Acceptance, because Fat is the challenge that must be Accepted in order to be conquered.

When you’re trying to fuck fat mammoth hogs like I do all the time, it’s inevitable you’re going to face all kinds of bumps in the road. All kinds… Believe me, it’ll test your faith not just in fat acceptance, but also in the Lord himself. I remember this one time I was getting ready to fuck this seriously super sized hoodrat bitch’s ass, when right before sex she broke down in tears. I had to listen to her long sob story about how she got trouble finding a man, and how she couldn’t believe I wanted her. She went real deep too, talking about how she likes using corndogs as dildos. I was stuck cradling her belly flab in my arms for a few hours. Damn, I was about to fall asleep listening to her shit when finally we got down to some fucky fucky.

I skipped the food foreplay and went straight for the her cock-pockets. She was so fat, she could play hide and seek with her genitals – a real BBW queen. It took me a while to find her pussy with all those slabs gettin’ in the way. I started thinking about just pounding her face and calling it a night cause I was too tired to drill for pussy oil, but then I said to myself, “Nigel, come on now, you know better than to not be a man of true Fat Acceptance.” So I kept hitting it until finally I heard her moan. I got excited and went balls deep only to find out it was actually her asshole. Fuck, Wrong hole! I decided to keep my cool and pull out anyway cause the condom came off and got lost somewhere in another slab — lord knows where. Anyway, I pulled out my chocolate yardstick, put on a new jimmy hat and put it right back in; when all of the sudden I noticed a brown, stank corndog rolled out; before I could bust a nut too, shittt. She got up and tried to waddled to the bathroom but she was leaving a trail of dew dew on the way. Man, good thing I left a tarp under my bed. I ran over to my secret forklift in the other room and came back to help her situate herself over the toilet — she was real heavy too, thank god my toilets are made of steal instead of porcelain. Anyway, I was prepared and willing to fix the situation; that’s what makes me a responsible gentleman. That’s what fat acceptance is all about: being ready, willing and prepared to accept any challenge, any problem. It’s like running up a steep hill, going up is a bitch but once you get to the top you feel good.

To make a long story short, the following day I spent the whole afternoon in my fishing boots, in the bathroom fixing the plumbing. Thank god my toilets are made of steal instead of porcelain. I was putting in work with my 10 foot industrial grade plunger, it felt more like I was churning butter or a giant cauldron of dew-stew. I was sweating real hard, getting dew dew stains on my fresh new chef outfit. Fuck my life I thought, then I remembered FAT ACCEPTANCE. It’s all part of the grand challenge: every day presents battles, a new hustle… Of course, the greatest challenge is still hitting the big ass itself, now that’s a real obstacle 😉

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

When BBWs Act UP

Who you think you is, BITCH!!!???

Who you think you is BITCH!!!??? MY BITCH THATS WHO!!!

Sorry for the hiatus my chub-brothers. Nigel X. Davis is back in the house to rupture volcanic ass and spread the word of Big Game without shame baby. I’m back with a vengeance after the rough shit I had to deal with two fuckin’ weeks ago in my house. This one BBW became so belligerent with her straight up crossin’ the line, Big-Mama-Drama-Queen bullshit, that I had to check her. I had to put the hippo down; you know, sometimes you get these wild bitches that got a potato chip on their shoulders, man they think they are something. They bring the trouble that makes me like, “Hell no bitch, you are finished!” every single time.

So it was roughly two weeks ago that I invited a big bitch over my house for a nice, home cooked, six course gourmet dinner. I was on my best behavior with candles lit, music turned up, and in my professional chef clothes as I escorted her via wheelchair to my dining room. As I rolled her on up to the table she started looking unhappy. I was like, “baby, is everything all right?” She pointed at the food and rolled her eyes, “that’s not enough!” I was like “Ok baby, I got this, I got this!” And I went back to my kitchen and made her extra food. By the time I came back with more food she had already eaten most of what was on the table, without me. I was stunned, what a rude bitch! But, praise the lord, I kept my mouth shut like a southern gentleman. Soon after she tilted her head back and opened her mouth, then I realized she expected me to feed her. I hesitated at first, but she waved me over and pointed toward the mashed potatoes. “okay…. fine.” I gave in, took out this big spoon and shoveled three bowls into her mouth. Soon I was feeding her everything on the table with my bare hands, and letting her lick my fingers. I tried to get her to lick some food off my dick but she just pushed it away. What nerve! I just shrugged it off as hot foreplay at first, but then I remembered from past experience: she’s just trying to make me her bitch. My inner voice was like “No way hoe! I’m not your black slave” — you know, I prefer it the other way around.

Then it was time for dessert. I decided to continue keeping this smooth. I brought out the cake and she got really excited when she saw it. She was flapping her flabby arms in the air, grinning with a triple chin smile. Eight layers with vanilla ice cream on top: It was a wedding cake just for us. I cut out a piece and popped it in her mouth with the utmost grace of a perfect basketball shot. It landed so perfectly, it was a moment of glory. All of the sudden she spit it out and sneered at me. I couldn’t believe that shit. I was like “WHAT THE HELL BITCH..”  Her: “This is NOT AN ICE CREAM CAKE!!! EW!!! I WANT ICE CREAM CAKE!!!”

I ran back into the kitchen so fast that my toque blanche (chef’s hat) almost fell off. I tossed the first cake out the window and scrambled for supplies to make a new one. I was sweating with fury, forgetting the original reason I had brought her over for dinner: to fuck her fat white ass. I was too busy to think about myself… too busy carefully scooping up and sculpting the vanilla ice cream into a cake, a cake fit for a queen. I patted each layer down with my dick a few times to give it just the right texture, hardening the crust. Despite my blue balls I pushed on, working like a true artisan who mastered his craft. I did it all for her, I went the whole nine yards. I even coated the top layer with jizz and blow-torched it into a creme brulee. I was so proud of that cake when it was finished that I ran out with it, but as soon as I set foot back into the dining room, somehow I tripped into the cake. FFFFFFuck. I fell face first into that cake, with most of the layers all squished up all over the floor. That’s when she stood up from her wheelchair and pounded her fat fist into the table, “GOD DAMN IT, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY CAKE!!!!!!” When she said that I was so I fucking pissed… I grabbed my chef’s hat off my head and threw it on the ground with intense anger. I was so mad, I jumped on it too. I even ripped my apron off. “I ain’t your chef no more, you fat bitch!” Yup, I called her a fat bitch. I had to tell her the truth. When chef Nigel throws his hat down, that’s the signal that I’m about to throw down.

The final straw came when she threaten to sit on me as punishment — now don’t get me wrong, I like gettin’ sat on by a big bitch, but only voluntarily. When she dared to threaten me, I got back up real quick and ran on back into that kitchen. She was half way across the dinning room when I popped back out with my three-foot egg beater. I turned the lights off to set the mood: a beatdown for dessert.

i-beater ass

I whipped that thing out and beat her ass and pussy down to the ground. I took that thing and whisked her pussy up so hard, she gonna need a separate funeral for it. I fucking plunged her head first into what was left of the ice cream cake, making her finish it off the floor while I went ball deep in her. It was gameover. I put her in her place.

Moral of the story: Some fat hoes are straight up belligerent, possessed by the devil. You gotta make’em sweat it out.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

Sharing is Caring

Look at those slab-titties. She could hide donuts in her chest, In fact she did. I swear.

Being a Christian brother, I’m all about giving and sharing; and let me tell you, big girls are easier and more fun to share. Their larger size makes them more suitable for gangbangs, with more surface-to-area and endless depths of an endless number folds waiting to be discovered. And because they have a lower self-esteem, their need for validation will bring them right back to you like a boomerang anyway, that’s why we call these BBW honeys “boomerang bitches”; so with big girls there’s room for everything except jealousy, and It warms my heart to share with other men. It’s better than trading baseball cards. This is why I always say Fat Acceptance is about bringing men together.

Here’s an example: the girl above, I picked her up at the waffle house. She was scarfing down this huge double stack of pancakes when I approached her with some maple syrup. I accidentally spill it on her cleavage and was like, “aww I’m sorry, my bad baby, let’s fix that.” We rushed into the rest room with that stack of pancakes, and I let her try it out with some chocolate syrup ;). Anyway, the waffle house manager came in while we were finishing up. He was looking pissed until I invited him to join in. To my surprise, it turned into a threesome, and as a result our meals were on the house. Wow, karma does exist. When you give, God gives back in mysterious ways.

Sometimes I like to throw surprise parties at my place with my homies. They come over thinking it’s just another night of cards and beer, until after a few drinks I bring the fattie in. Usually the party doesn’t start until I roll her up in a golden wheelchair, that way she can feel special too — I love making BBWs feel like queens. Then we get to business! Give her a bib to wear, maybe some goggles for eye protection, shit. Usually they like it in the eye, cause I tell every BBW it’s good for her vision. Keeps the sandman at bay. Fat girls have fat faces so usually it’s hard to miss, but just in case we have a tarp underneath. That way all the missed loads can be collected and funneled over some doughnuts or pancakes for her to finish off. Hey, they’re starving kids in Africa, and if she doesn’t get that we’ll point and yell at her “Finish your jizz!” We like to use a snow shovel to spoon feed her those soggy doughnuts/pancakes. Hey, we ain’t gonna touch that shit with a fork, hellll no.

After I break in every new BBW my kitchen is usually a mess, that’s why I got my post gangbang cleanup crew: Jose, Hector, Juan and Julio. They mop up free of charge because they know they get to cuddle with the sloppy seconds after they are done making my kitchen sparkle. I get my kitchen cleaned and they get some fat white pussy, it’s a win/win for everyone; even Mr. Clean approves. That’s how I got my deck built too. They know to keep this on the down low, or else all their buddies back home will be crossing the border like crazy.

And like I was saying, these girls are like boomerangs; you can spread ’em around and they come right back. They got more to give, literally. God bless those that share.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

Baby, ain’t No Shame in having a Big Frame

My new ride: Drive-thru/Drive-by gangbang mobile. Comes with  a 26″ happy meal 😉

Fat Acceptance is all about making a big woman feel comfortable in her own body, and making her feel special too. If you think otherwise you aren’t going to get very far in this big game business. Building comfort is one of the main pillars of big game hustling, and it isn’t over after sex either. Extra large girls need extra large comfort, because their self-esteem is a fragile joke to say the least — why else would a “Fat Acceptance” movement even exist?

I see it all the time when I hit up the malls just to creep around the food court: big bitches sitting real low, trying to hide their mountainous flesh under a table while they eat. Usually I spot her from a distance: her face sticking up from a table like a wackamole popping out for some crack. Once I get close enough, I’m usually pleasantly surprised and amazed at her ability to hide all her shit under the table. It’s always some kind of Houdini shit. Then I get that feeling… It’s the same feeling you got as a kid when you opened a happy meal and got two toys instead of one, or extra fries. And truth is, she feels exactly that way too when I roll up and my eyes pop out to zoom in on that ass. I got a real happy meal for her though.

Usually I bring my aura of comfort with me by visualizing myself as her favorite comfort food when I approach, and sometimes I also eat next to her for a little while. I take it real slow, whereas other amateur chubsters fuck up by opening their mouth right away, asking her about her size or saying shit like “you hungry?” They end up reminding her that she’s a fattie by insinuating it. Never make her feel fat! Instead you gotta wait a bit, be patient. I like to wait until she farts, then I take the blame for her and act like it was my fault; I apologize and try to fan it away from her so she can continue eating in peace. That’s how a real man shows a big woman he’s a true gentleman.

Big bitches have bigger intestines so they have more gas build up; a lot of that gas gets released during and after sex, and boy do they get self conscious about it and flip out. Again, I turn this around by starting a farting contest in bed. See, i’m keeping it real positive, making it into fun game. And I’ve got to admit that farting is a huge turn on. When she farts during sex, man, I lose myself in the moment, in the passion… especially when it’s louder than her moans. If she can toot long enough, I go balls deep in that ass and create a new instrument: an anal jizz fart.

When you are fucking a big bitch, her wet sweaty flabs will flap together and make tons of fart noises anyway — it’s like a symphony of farts — so she’ll feel self-conscious no matter what. You’ve got to be ready to flip it around, turn it into something positive and fun. Another example: sometimes when she farts, I’ll try to guess what she ate from the smell. You can’t go wrong there, because no matter what you guess her last meal was, you’ll be right, cause she ate everything. Then it’s her turn to guess when I pop my dick in her mouth and she can figure out what I ate (usually they guess McRib sandwich).

But it isn’t just farts, this applies to any area that a big woman might be self conscious about. Farting was just an easy example. Look at it this way: you have to visualize each BBW (big beautiful woman) as a damsel in distress, trapped in her own flesh, and then bring her out — rescue her and make it fun. It’s all bullshit, cause you know I want them to stay fat as fuck, but hey you gotta play the game. Hat tip to the motherfuckers that get it now.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

Silence of the Hams

Recently a very clever brother I know, we’ll call him JW, came up with a very interesting tactic that I decided to borrow (thanks brother). I’m sure he won’t mind since he’s left the game to live an ascetic existence in the Caribbean. Anyway, I’ve already successfully incorporated this method into my own chubby chasing arsenal. Let me break it down for you.

The idea behind this: Instead of going to Walmart all the time, why not get these mammoth-walrus sluts to waddle there way to my place? Ahah, light bulbs lit up and then exploded in my head like fireworks when I figured out how to do this shit. It’s simple: just pretend you are some kind of talent scout for a beauty pageant or modeling agency. I started putting out flyers and ads on craigslist for a BBW beauty pageant promoting fat acceptance. Here’s the flyer I used:

The results were off the chain. It was like something out of Hansel and Gretel, and I was the witch with the gingerbread house; but instead it’s made of pizza and cornbread too. In fact, the auditions were held at my house, and I laid out trails of cornbread covered with nutella from the front door to my bedroom. When each BBW entered through the front door for the audition, she knew this is the place to show off her fat acceptance, where she can comfortably embrace her lack of willpower.

When a fattie approaches, I leave my door unlocked and open it just a crack, so it swings open when she knocks. As she enters, the BBW sees the trail of food and hears the voice “Come on in baby. Treat-yo self.” It’s my voice coming from the bedroom, as I lie in wait for the impending ambush. She starts eating the food that leads to my bedroom, as I put on my ski mask and turn up some R&B music. As she follows the trail of food into the hallway, getting closer, the tension thickens.

The sound of her chewing gets louder and louder as she gets closer, and my dick gets harder and harder as I hear her grunting like a hog while she eats. My body starts sweating, as I become more impetuous. Finally (this is where my experience in Mixed Martial Arts comes in handy) I leap out of the bedroom and judo throw her extra-large ass to the ground, then hogtie her up. Now the pipe laying commences. My joint is harder than wood in wintertime when I plunge it into that pussy, balls deep. It goes in so hard sparks fly out because of all the friction. She squeals in pain with the nutella and cornbread still stuck in her mouth, while I’m throwing up her flabs like a pizza chef tosses dough in the air. Finally smoke starts coming out that pussy — time to switch holes! After I break off a nut or two in that ass, I turn up some James Brown and bust a move, woooo. That’s how I celebrate a fine day. After beaten that fat pussy up, time to put some ice cream on that ass to cool it down; open a few windows to let the tension out, and hear the birds sing.

If she is still around, I let her have some cookie dough as a treat. BBWs get hungry after sex. Plus It definitely ain’t rape if she licks cookie dough off my balls.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

Haters Gonna Hate

One thing you’ll notice about my blog is that some of my more controversial posts get nasty comments from bitter, angry fatties unworthy of the BBW title. If there is one thing that distinguishes a fat hoe from a BBW, it’s her capacity to be comfortable in her own skin and big flabby-flabs — not unleashing a shit storm of pent up big fat player hate against me, the one man that’s showing the way to Fat Acceptance. I pray for each hater when she leaves hate on my blog, because God knows all haters go to hell.

fat woman that a hater

What my haters look like after they read one of my posts. “Hey bitch, there’s a twinkie behind you.”

My haters seem to gravitate toward my Sex Slave post and my About Me section. So let’s analyze some of these evil, hateful comments. It’s time for me to address them here and now:

Really? I cook all kinds of pizza and fried chicken and make ice cream, for all my bitches! I don’t hate them for their larger size, I love them for it! You call that misogyny??! Bitch, what are you smoking? Crack? No wonder you can’t find Mr. Right. Good luck anyway.

Next we got this mysterious fattie playing the hater role (again). She probably has a low self esteem and we all know what that means…

I’m just telling the truth. And you don’t even deserve a cream pie with that  horrible fattitude. You sound hungry though, and hunger is the leading cause of all fattitudes. Nigel’s fat camp is enrolling. We take in women that have self-esteem issues for sure 😉

Next up we got us a real big, thick, extra-fat Jabba the Slut that is really a secret admirer. She wants to subscribe to Nigel’s feeding and breeding program, but there’s some kind of cognitive dissonance that prevents her from admitting it. She is in the closet, waiting for some chocolate:

Come on… You know you want it. But since you can’t openly admit it, you spit hate on my Big Game Blog. I highlighted what you said about liking sex slavery, Freudian slip? The gates to Nigel’s pig pen are open, come on in and we’ll wrestle in the mud.

This fat little piggy has hate rolling off her sweaty flabs. I think all that hate violates the laws of Feng Shui or Chi or whatever. Confucius say “when fat bitch angry, she should turn the other chin”, but unfortunately she doesn’t listen to Confucius.

“Fat women lie about rape all the time” BINGO! Sometimes haters accidentally spill out some truth. God, if someone put me to the test, I wouldn’t be arrested, I’d get a trophy. A trophy for first place in fat acceptance and big game. What would you get a trophy for Rachel? Besides being a fat ass bitch? Champion summer sausage swallower?

And here’s a hater that’s full of shit:

Un huh… Really? You feel this way too?

But she is actually a hypocrite. In my Fat Rating System post she wants to know how she measures up, when she left this comment:

Hypocrite….You’re a groupie in denial.

That concludes this post. There are other haters for sure, and some manginas are haters that are angry because they get no vagina. Not all is lost with the female haters though, because each one is just one good dick away from healing. I know this for sure, because I have a degree in holistic healing, and let me tell you: sex is therapeutic. It is the way to healing for all angry fat feminist hate mongers. Fat Acceptance is about healing as much as it is about gettin’ bigger ass.

The 10 Commandments of Big Game Hustling.

The 10 Commandments of Chubby Chasing.

Sometimes posts get long and the critical information you need — the tips and tactics — get lost in my flamboyant, eloquent fancy writing style. So as a man of God It’s my duty to simplify your spiritual journey to Big Fat Ass ‘n’ Pussy, as well as helping you define your moral compass at the same time. I’m going to whip it out like Moses with his staff, and lay it out for you to see all in a single post. This is not going to be your typical blog roundup post. I’m doing this 10 commandments style, bringing you holy Big Game wisdom to help you with your Big Game Hustle. Amen.

1. Feed your Big Beautiful Women. These women are hungry and they need your help. In the Bible God tells us to feed the hungry, so this is really killing two birds with one stone. You win points with God and you get her excited to come back your place for more food at the same time. Follow this advice and you’ll get two thumbs up from God when you hit that mammoth pussy. After a night of banging out earth-quaking-ass, don’t forget to make her breakfast in bed the morning after.

2. Be Blessed where the Sun don’t Shine. If you manage to get a BBW back to your place with the pretense of getting some food, she’ll be expecting to devour a serious sized summer sausage too. There is a very good reason for this: the physics of penetration. You won’t make a dent in those thick rolling slabs and thunder thighs with a small Asian dick. If you want to be a Big Game Hunter, you gotta use a high caliber bullet. This is where black guys come in 😉

3. Help Guide Fat Women to become BBWs. The journey from fat slut to Big Beautiful Woman is a spiritual one. As an ambassador of fat ass gettin’, it is your job to guide each fattie to BBW-hood, by making lewd comments and suggesting things that accentuate her chubbiness. Tell her it makes your dick hard. Tell her to let the flabs hang out. Tell her that her muffin tops look tasty like real muffins. Tell her you want to jizz in her insulin pump. Play video games with her after you fuck her. It’s a wonderful sedentary activity that will later force her to believe in body-acceptance because video games make you fatter.

4. Fulfill her rape fantasy. Fat women feel an intense urge to be wanted, even though most men are afraid to harpoon big punani. They develop imaginary stalkers and rapists to fill the void; that way they have something to talk about when their thinner friends talk about sex.

5. Become a Better Man by Increasing your Notch Count. God created all men equal. But if there is one thing that separates the men from the boys, it’s a high notch count. In America, with the rising rate of obesity, the only solution is to become a chubby chaser.

6. Protect your BBWs from the outside world. Many extremely large women are discriminated against, persecuted and made to feel ashamed of their size. The largest ones are gawked at like they’re side show freaks. This is why it’s important to insulate your big-bitches from the outside world. As soon as you snatch one up, lock her up in your fat love fortress so the outside world doesn’t harm her anymore.

7. Embrace and share the gospel of Fat Acceptance. As men doing God’s work, It is absolutely imperative to show our love for Big Beautiful Women. One way is to stand up and shout it out loud, but the best way is to practice what you preach by bending that big behemoth slut over and letting her feel it too.

8. Be Safe. Wear your hard hat.

9. Become a Walmart Shopper. Walmart is the most successful retailer in America, because it was God’s will. And God wants us to shop there for our groceries 😉

10. Her Stomach is the key to her Heart. Learn how to cook, and how to cook well if you want to break through her big fat resistance to sex. Nothing eliminates last minute resistance like a fatigue inducing insulin rush. Whooooo, who the fuck needs Chloroform when you can use fried-chicken-alfredo-pizza and Faygo soda?

Why big women prefer Brothers

If you ask me, Fat is the new black; and all these Fat, Big Beautiful Women want is acceptance. They just want to be accepted, no matter what their size is, rather than be discriminated against. And let me tell you somethin’, discrimination is the consequence of racism — where there’s cornbread, there’s chicken, and where there’s discrimination there’s racism. But if you think racism is only about color, you’re probably a racist and don’t even know it yet. Racism is like a shape shifting monster that’s hiding in a dark room, waiting to rape you. It can transform itself into discrimination against someone’s culture/religion, sexual-orientations, and in this case: shape and size. This is why we have the Fat Acceptance Movement and places like Reddit, it’s like the underground railroad for fat people.

Often big women are discriminated against because of their size: men turn them down, employers turn them down, flight attendants kick them out of the plane because they take up more seating than they purchased… All that hassling, but they never bother getting to know the BBW and how beautiful she is on the inside. It’s discrimination out of ignorance, it’s Fascism against fat. Sometimes men are so cruel that they will actually get drunk and hook up with these big beautiful beasts, only to run off once they’ve sobered up, and laugh about it with their buddies. It’s a hump and dump game, but without any feeding; and that is no way to treat these gentle giants — a real man at least feeds his bitches.

This is where Black men come in. When a fat (white) woman sees a brother, she sees a man that understands what it’s like to be hated, to feel discriminated against, and she sees this as a man she can vibe with, that will feel her, empathizing with her struggle. It’s also an opportunity for her to get some dick. She sees black men as opportunist of ass, taking every opportunity for it, because they believe in accepting people. She knows brother’s typically love big thick asses too 😉

Anyway, the point is… they know that we know that they know that we both love eating at McDonald’s. Now not all brother’s love fat girls, but a disproportionately larger number of us will hit that BBW pussy, whereas most wussy-ass white/asian boys unwittingly discriminate against fat ass. It’s thanks to black guys (yours truly) that are showing the way to empowerment and self-acceptance, helpin’ fat women to embrace their bodies and love themselves. Without us, being a fat woman would be so much more painful; every fat hoe would be forced to buy into the fascist Hollywood stereotypes of beauty — huffing and puffing at the gym as she turns into a twig. Every good, fat accepting black man is a fat bitch’s Harriet Tubman, showing her the way through the underground railroad to fat acceptance dick. Amen, A-fucking-men…

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

Safe Sex for Chubby Chasers

When it comes to Big Game Hunting, safe sex is a priority, especially for you.

Need a ride to the other side man?

You gotta come prepared for this game, and make sure you satisfy every prerequisite — which I’ve covered before with regards to your strength and having the right size. But even that isn’t enough, you also have to take precautions to avoid severe injury, disaster and even death. That’s what’s so thrilling about chasing chubbies around, because you’re attempting to kill pussy that can kill you if you don’t watch out and use my common sense safety tips.

Amateur Chubby Chaser: Fatality waiting to happen.

What could go wrong? It’s usually a story like this: the typical amateur chubby chaser always thinks he’s ready.. He’s been lifting weights all week to prepare for this Olympic feat. She’s all hot and ready sitting in a steel reinforced wheelchair as he rolls her into his motel room. He lies on the bed first, takes off his clothes, and then pulls out a box of donuts that were hiding under the pillows. It all seems to go down smooth, like some kind of well choreographed R Kelly shit, until all of the sudden she leaps out of the wheel chair and this happens:

She’s not on bath salts. She’s just licking donut jelly off his face, as he dies.

His breathing begins to cut off due to the extreme weight pressing down on his chest, but she’s too busy licking the donut jelly off of his face to notice he’s dying. This could last for hours, or even days if she is too heavy to help herself off. But hey, that’s natural selection homie, that’s why there aren’t many chubby chasers around — us real chubsters, we’re an elite crew of fat sex survivors. If you want to join the Fat Acceptance league of extraordinary gentlemen, here’s some safety advice:

1. Unless you are black belt motherfucker like yours truly, never ever ever ever ever ever let that big ass mammoth-bitch on top of you. I don’t care if that’s how ya like it, you want to live right? Anything above 165 pounds can fuck up your pelvis for real. Anything above 200 pounds can send you to hell if you are stupid enough. Always stay on top like a real man. I know some of you have squash fetishes, and you want your BBW to sit on your face. Fine, but if you must, wear a hard hat so your skull remains intact.

 

Wear a hard hat when she sits on your face

Wear a hard hat when she sits on your face

2. Never let her roll on top of you. This is similar to rule #1, but if you are lying together cuddling before/after sex, you’re guard will be down. Stay calm, but be ready to roll away and jump on top if she rolls toward you. Do not let her on top unless you want to suffocate to death under layers of wet, doughy flesh.

3. Keep food off of you until you are absolutely ready for her to come at you and lick it off. Even if you’re standing and sprinkle confectioner’s sugar on your dick, you might get tackled NFL style bitch. The excitement of food is so strong in these women that a burst of energy will possess them if they even smell it — as opposed to their otherwise lethargic nature.

4. For her safety, don’t over-feed her at least an hour before sex. She may have a big body, but her little heart can only pump so much blood; and if most of it is pipe-lining to her stomach instead of her pussy (because she’s processing 8 pounds of funnel cake you bought her at the funfair) she won’t have any energy for sex. This is actually a classic amateur chubby chaser mistake. She might even have a heart attack while you’re pounding that ass. Why risk it? It kills the moment if the fat lady can’t scream because her blood flow is off.

5. Tie your BBW to the bed, otherwise she’ll roll around destroying the whole room. Broken glass and shit isn’t safe. Since I’m really into fat dungeon sex, I use handcuffs and ropes to tie my fat sex slaves up so they can’t move. I like to turn it up a notch by teasing them with food while they’re restrained. It’s a great way to torture a fat slut, and it’s safer then letting her whale ass maneuver around the room, and having furniture and lamps destroyed.

6. Don’t take a shower with her after sex. This one should be obvious, do you want to die in a bathtub? When 2 enter the shower, the BBW will leave and wonder where you went.

It’s important that you follow this advice, because what good will you do for the Fat Acceptance movement if you are dead? None. But It’s your funeral bitch.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

You gotta feed your bitches

So wait hold up son, you think you can handle being a Chubby Chaser and Fat Sex Dungeon Master? You think you can manage a harem of obedient fat sex slaves? You’re crazy… Unless you follow my chubster 101 advice.

The secret to keeping any fat woman obedient is through her stomach. That’s right, let me repeat: the key to the pussy is through her stomach. You gotta feed ’em if you wanna bang them. Why else do you think I became a professional chef? I’ll save that chef part for another post. Anyway, it isn’t as simple as calling up Domino’s and getting a few extra large pizzas for your hoes. You might think that makes you a gentleman, but the truth is they can order up extra-large sausage pizzas on their own — without your sausage present. However, If you can cook a decent meal, you have a serious edge over other chubby chasers that depend on Pizza Hut and Chinese take out. Not only is homemade food far better, It’s also sexier and more seductive for her to see you with nothing on but your apron while you’re making a gourmet meal.

Photo of my brick oven. I’m making two pizzas: one for her and one for me. Makes her feel special; then I serve her chocolate sausage pizza for dessert to make her anus feel famous.

When you can cook her gourmet food, she becomes dependent on you for that high quality food. You’ve possessed her taste buds, you own her palate, you’ve got her. On top of this, she’ll eventually associate the good taste and feeling of eating that food with you. By creating this dependency, she is forced to obey your every command as a submissive sex slave, or else no more food. In general, it’s a great way to reward her for sex.

However, when she doesn’t obey you, you have to punish your fat sex slave by cutting that bitch off from your food supply. It’s that simple. If she doesn’t put out when and how you want her to, and If she doesn’t totally behave as a proper chubby slave, you cut that bitch off — no more fried meatballs and spaghetti with pesto, no more deep fried tacos, no more dutch chocolate pastries and pies. Of course it’s always necessary to follow this up with an extra punishment. I personally jump on top of my slaves, forcing them to give me piggy back ride that are painful for them, this coincides with the zapping each slab of fat with my cattle prod. Another great punishment involves pouring rainbow sprinkles on her muffin tops and biting into them hard enough to cause severe pain and bleeding. I love biting muffin tops, it’s so sexy! And with rainbow sprinkles, it’s tasty too. You can even use this technique to train your other fat sex slaves to punish each other.

But in conclusion, proper fat sex slave management revolves around your ability to feed your bitches, and you should feed them well as a reward for obedience. When they misbehave, you cut them off as punishment, and punish them more for good measure. After you punish them, reward your BBWs with some candy.

Other chubby chasers will hate me when they find out… I’ve got my own candy shop. How can they compete with that? My double fudge lollipop melts in a fat bitch’s mouth.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame