Annihilating last minute resistance: one plate at a time.

My brothers, have you ever thought that maybe last minute resistance isn’t some sort of anti-slut defense mechanism at all, but in fact a universal shit test designed to test the steel, courage and alphaness of every man? Have you ever thought that it’s something ancient, instilled in womankind through our human evolution, in order to weed out weak beta male bitches like you? Let me tell you about resistance homie; Oscar Wilde once said it best: Sex is about power. Ya dig nigga?  Of course we all know that women love to be dominated; but it’s not merely a sexual fetish, over-coming resistance is a display of POWER that all women want and expect. Now I know what you’re wondering, “but uncle Nigel, how do you over power a woman twice your size?” Good question my little chubsters. Luckily there is a shortcut to this ancient test, a unique and special way that I discovered to severely weaken a fat bitch’s resistance to your sexual POWER and domination.

Now obviously when I’m talkin’ about power and domination, I don’t mean you should just whip your dills out and slam dunk her trunk on the street (you ain’t even ready for that shit) but that’s why we have game, ya herr. You gotta be gentle with these giants all the way through before you get to demolition that cottage-cheese ass with your wrecking-balls. It’s like stalking a giant animal you want to kill, like a big ass fucking lion or rhino in the African wilderness. That’s why I refer to chubby chasing as “big game” hunting, because if you move too quickly you’re asking for trouble — trust me, you don’t want to startle a 300 pound mammoth bitch and get sumo stomped to the curb. This is what makes chubby chasing so thrilling: trying to kill pussy that can kill you. You’ve got to tranquilize these big ass beasts before you close in for sex, or else her 300 pounds of last minute resistance will leave you in a world of hurt.

Don’t rush in for sex yet, it’s dangerous.

The solution to eliminating resistance is through her stomach: get her to eat, and eat a whole lot. This is why I was trained in the culinary arts. I cook up things in advance like macaroni and ham salads, fried pizza bagels with extra meat, hog grease fries topped with sugar, hand made beef lasagna, and funnel cakes (also with extra sugar). To keep it simple and easy, I always make these same meals, and I always cook extra shit so I don’t run out. To turn things up a notch, I often use my own bodily fluids to make it creamier or add extra spice; like the juice I serve with every meal “you want lemonade with dinner baby? I got you covered, literally.”  My goal with all of this food and drink is to shut her system down — getting her to over eat her way to chronic fatigue, until she’s too lethargic to resist sex and physical domination.

How I destroy last minute resistance.

How it’s done: I roll her in on a wheelchair to the dining table. After bringing her the first dish, I put my hand around her as she eats, petting her hair and inner thighs until she gets comfortable with my kino escalation. In between meals I run off into the kitchen to get the next meal, there’s a special peep hole in there that I can use to watch her while she eats, and masturbate if I want. Several meals later she might say she is full, however thanks to experience I know this line is bullshit. I mean, how often does a fat woman say she’s full? Once she says this line or starts to slow down her intake, this is when I take my feeding program to the next level. I start by saying shit like, “baby, try this next dish. It’s so good. Just one more bite for Nigel. Open wide” and sometimes I’m literally spoon feeding her. Once that fails, I strangle her, tie her up with rope, and throw her to the ground to await further punishment. Time to whip out the funnel, shove it in her mouth and pour down some liquefied beef jerky into that bitch, as well as vodka to get her drunk.

Now the fun begins: I roll her up in my carpet (piggy in a blanket style) and call over my boys Billy and Omar. What demonstrates POWER more than the ability to completely submit a giant fat slut? And by inviting my home boys over, I demonstrate higher value, flipping the leader-of-men switch in her brain. Being the Alpha male of the group, I get all the men to huddle as we plan her next meal: a huge cream pie for dessert.

follow me on twitter for more big game advice @NigelBigGame

19 thoughts on “Annihilating last minute resistance: one plate at a time.

  1. Nigel, how can you call women “fat bitches” ?!? That is NOT nice! You should use nice words like rubenesque, or voluptuous, even thick or chunky would be fine. It’s 2012, time to change the vocabulary a little 😉 That being said, I think size acceptance is a wonderful, beautiful thing! God bless your heart for recognizing real beauty, which is on the inside!

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  5. Hahahaha! I do not know what is funnier in the blog. The posts from a genius of satire or the comments from all the clueless ignoramuses.

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